Lockdown 28/47 – Pure Joy
Day 28 of my diary of a LOTR Fan Museum owner during our national lockdown (extended from 28 to 47 days: 33 at level 4, 14 at L3) – in NZ we’re uniting as a country to beat Covid-19 to break the chain and save lives, but …
About 1-2 months ago the world changed! Don’t we all know it!! For some, things changed forever through lost loved ones or lost livelihoods. For others, the changes are less dramatic though who knows what’s going to happen as we hopefully move beyond immediate management of the virus.
I now only have one job – STAY HOME, be kind. I share this job with my countryfolk and many people world-wide. But some also have second jobs - essential workers in particular but also many doing their former job from home, and second jobs will increase from next week. Some also have extra jobs that sit with the new job, such as caring for dependents who were previously in other educational or caring arrangements.
Because I only have the one new job, I often feel pretty useless actually. In my bubble, my beloved has a second job and my bubble sister got the call yesterday that may initiate her return to her former job. She said she’s never been so excited to go to work!!
I’m finding this pretty hard and I’m having to face up to things that are confronting. My beloved and I are having to make some difficult, life-changing choices. I wonder if it’s going to feel better or worse after the choices are made - when I can stand up and say “I will take it”.
As I work through this, I am drawing strength and energy from doing constructive things to improve well-being such as exercise and better diet (not easy when I see all the fantastic cooking my friends post on FB!!). LOTR is a comfort as I find inspiration from JRR, I enjoy the fan community, and I am trying to keep some light burning from my former job as operator of The One Room Fan Museum.
And, I’m so lucky with my loved ones as we can share the hard stuff and support each other, even though everyone (understandably) seems a bit needy at present.
Yesterday, however, I had a moment of pure joy that transcended everything else. I had a video conversation with my daughter in China. I haven’t “seen” her for 14 months and it was inexpressibly wonderful to see her there.
I hadn’t realised just how deeply I was missing her, worrying about her … . I even now feel tearful remembering … . I love you darling!
I envy those people who are locked down with their kids. And, in this world of turmoil, my thoughts today go out to parents, and to those whose loved ones are far away. And, I just want to say how lucky I feel to have modern communication technology - it makes it easier. Best wishes, Kathy xx
